Daily Archives: January 15, 2011

It’s 10pm..Do You Know Where Your Children Are?

Do you remember that commercial growing up?

I know where mine are, 2 are on my bed (good thing for king size), and I swear 1 has taken residence up in my bed for the last 3 days and I just don’t have the heart to ask him to leave. One is in their bedroom, supposedly reading..hmmm, I’m not so sure I buy that, but it’s quiet and well, I’ll take quiet right now.

When your husband travels, I think you just do what you have to do to get through the days and nights until he gets back home. I learn to pick my battles when he is not around and well, some of them are just not important enough to argue and fight about. Sometimes I consider it a damn good day when everyone is up and dressed and out the door for school in one piece. It really is tough being a one parent household,honestly, much praise and admiration to all you single parents out there. It’s a damn hard job and you’re doing fantastic!

At the end of the day like this, when we all have made it through and no one has been injured (by themselves or each other)and everyone has been tended to, I can look at all their sleepy little faces and smile. I can smile because A) their happy little rear ends are going to bed (yea!) and B) as crazy as they make me sometimes, I truly am in love with all of them. I can look in their faces and be reminded of their father, whether it’s their noses, or their eyes or their mannerisms, they all carry a piece of their father with them. When I’m missing him, all I have to do is look at them, he’s there.. because they are a piece of him.

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Random thoughts

I am finding this whole new found blogging thing quite cathartic. Considering I’m not really good with talking about my feelings  (ewwww), I’m finding this rather..dare I say..enjoyable?

(Question, for those of you that read this or any blog, do you read them in your own voice in your head? Or do you assign a voice to it? Like what you think the person would sound like? Do you hear my voice in your head? I mean, for those that know me in real life?? That makes me giggle..my voice..IN YOUR HEAD..*giggle*)

I did it again..I digressed. I suppose you will need to get used to that and try to keep up.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking the last few days, trying to figure out what I want to write about. Trying to piece together the thoughts in my head in some sort of order, but I’m thinking that doing that makes it somewhat unnatural. So, I’ll just write as the thoughts come to my head. Afterall, they are so random to me, why shouldn’t they be for you too, as a reader? I think my biggest fear in writing so freely is pissing someone off, I mean people can sometimes be so narcissistic that they may assume that I’m writing about them and  jump to unecessary conclusions. Let me say this, I will never use anyone’s name outright, I will mostly speak in general terms, but, understand..I am writing about my life and everyday events in my life.

DISCLAIMER:

If you feel that I may be w riting about you, and something I have written upsets you or makes you angry, I’m sorry..BUT, if your in MY life, chances are you may get written about in some fashion. If I’m writing about you, it’s because I care enough to include you in my writing because you have affected me in some way.

END DISCLAIMER

Slow Down.

A lot of runners I know tend to run all their easy runs a bit too fast, but I find that when confronting them about it, I usually, or basically get the feeling that, if they could, they would tell me to mind my own damn business.

They or the professionals say that one should run their easy every day runs anywhere from 90 seconds to a full 2 minutes slower than their last 5k race pace or thereabouts. If this is the case, than why do a lot of runners out there not adhere to it? I get a lot of, “Well, I feel GREAT” (reminds me of Tony the Tiger when I hear this), or “I’m just listening to my body” responses, but yet when you look at their stats for their last or last couple of races, sometimes they are not much more than a minute slower than their race paces. I don’t know why it irks me so much, but it does. I mean, it is not like their runs are affecting me on any level what so ever, they certainly don’t ask for my opinion or am I their coach, but it still bothers me. This leads me to, well, obviously they are not racing hard enough OR, it leads me right back to..their running their easy paces TO DAMN FAST!!

Again, WHY does this annoy me? This clearly is MY issue to work through.

I know that sometimes I tend to do the same exact thing, and yes, some days I feel too damn good to slow down. I mean, why should I? My legs feel good (check), I feel good aerobically (check), It’s a gorgeous day (check), and lastly, all the stars are aligned for this to be one of those days that everything clicks and my run feels almost effortless EVEN if it is about a minute faster per mile than I should be going. The thing is, I don’t do this  very often, maybe once or twice max a week. The rest of my runs (aside from my speedwork) are pretty easy. Sometimes, I must admit, that I get nervous because of how easy they feel. It often leads me to thinking “Hmmm, maybe I should be going a little faster”. I often find myself in a training dilemma that usually deals with this very thing. An inner conflict if you will. I have a coach that tells me that I need to slow my runs down one must slow down to eventually go faster. My goal IS to go/be faster after all, so..perhaps I should listen. THEN, I think, well if I go a little faster now, then won’t that help/aid my body in going even faster down the road? NO. OR, maybe yes, but then you may  possibly deal with an injury at some point. See, I firmly believe that if one does not do what they should be doing in training and does too much too soon, too fast too soon, too many miles too soon, that eventually all that is going to catch up with you. Maybe not NOW, and maybe NOT tomorrow, but at some point it will..and it will set you back. Too many damn stubborn people out there, who think they know every damn thing.

Again, why does this bother me so?

The truth is the only person that I need to be accountable for is myself. The only running I should care about is my own. The only race times I need to care about are..you got it..MINE. I also shouldn’t be telling anyone else how they should be doing their runs, or how they should be training..but I sometimes think, if I don’t say anything and they get hurt..then it’s somehow on some level partially my fault; I sat and watched a possible train wreck happen.

*sigh* again, why does this bother me so?

I will let you know when I figure that  one out.

Victorious

Strength for the body, mind + spirit. 1 Cor 15:57

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